Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Teaching Kids How To Assassinate The President


Teacher now placed on leave, may be fired.


Yes, that would be Alabama, where a geometry teacher decided assassinating President Obama would be the perfect way to teach 9th graders angles and parallel lines:

A Jefferson County teacher picked the wrong example when he used assassinating President Barack Obama as a way to teach angles to his geome­try students.

Someone alerted autho­rities and the Corner High School math teacher was questioned by the Secret Service, but was not taken into custody or charged with any crime.

Sexton said he generally doesn't discuss threat cases, but confirmed his of­fice investigated the inci­dent. No federal charges followed the probe.

The teacher was appar­ently teaching his geometry students about parallel lines and angles, officials said. He used the example of where to stand and aim if shooting Obama.

"He was talking about angles and said, 'If you're in this building, you would need to take this angle to shoot the president,' " said Joseph Brown, a senior in the geometry class.

Apparently the teacher has not been fired though he’s not talking to reporters, either. 

This is, after all, Alabama, where assassinating the country’s first black president is no doubt a fantasy harbored by many of the state’s fine upstanding citizens. For example, this parent:

Caroline Polk, the parent of a ninth-grader at the school, said she doesn't believe the teacher ought to be fired.

"We all make mistakes, and we should be able to learn from our mistakes," she said. "What he said was just wrong and inappropriate. Everyone's got their own opinions, but we have to be aware of our surroundings. At this point, it just needs to be handled in a way that it won't be repeated."

We have to be aware of our surroundings? That’s “real America” for ya, where discussing assassinating the president is a legitimate opinion that you, ya know, just need to keep to yourself when in polite company. The way you don’t talk about those dirty brown people who are ruining everything for everyone else. You know, in order to be politically correct and all.

Jeeeeeezus. What the hell is wrong with those people?

But you know, the best part about this whole story is going to be the inevitable false-equivalency that right-wingers will draw, once St. Rush has had time to hit the Great Gazoogle and find some small town teacher who said a mean thing about President Bush that one time. I’m sure that story is out there, and I’m sure it will be exactly the same as teaching kids where to stand to shoot at the president of the United States.

More from Shaw Kenawe.