Wednesday, May 26, 2010

You People Have Too Much Time On Your Hands

Looks like you Dirty Fucking Hippies took the House Republicans up on their offer to “send us your best ideas.” Hilarity ensued:
"End Child Labor Laws," suggests one helpful participant. “We coddle children too much. They need to spend their youth in the factories."

"How about if Congress actually do thier job and VET or Usurper in Chief, Obama is NOT a Natural Born Citizen in any way," recommends another. "That fake so called birth certificate is useless."

"A 'teacher' told my child in class that dolphins were mammals and not fish!" a third complains. "And the same thing about whales! We need TRADITIONAL VALUES in all areas of education. If it swims in the water, it is a FISH. Period! End of Story."

House Republicans, meet the World Wide Web.

Oh, the poor dears. Can you tell the fake conservatives from the real ones? I’m guessing the birther was a real conservative, “the child labor/dolphins are fish” commenters were fakes. But hey, you never know.

Check out these other ideas floated on the House GOP’s new website.

• American Values: Protecting the sanctity of life section:

“We're wasting our time protecting the sanctity of marriage by merely targeting gay marriage. We should immediately criminalize divorce.”

“Require all Muslims in the U.S. to wear ankle bracelet transponders so we know where the terrorists are at all times.”

“We should administer capital punishment to anyone who has an abortion. In order to cut costs that the death penalty normally entails, we will have lax gun laws that will allow people to obtain guns with greater ease. Then we would allow the "free-market" to dictate whose philosophy wins out – the liberals irrational philosophy or our logical and God following philosophy. Liberals who have abortions would be taken care of by a militia of the willing who will get rid of all liberals who take the life others irrationally and will allow us to remove all of our opponents to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.”


• American Values: Liberty and Freedom section:

”I want to drink from a separate water fountain again.”

“THIS IS ONE LAW I WOULD SUPPORT NO OTHER NATIONS FLAG CAN BE INSIDE OR WAVING AT ANY PUBLIC TAX PAYER FUNDED BUILDING. AND NO OTHER NATIONS LEADER CAN COME IN TO OUR CAPITOL AND CUT DOWN ONE OF OUR LAWS.”

• Job Creation:

“Eliminate the metric system. All the duplication in effort measuring everything twice could be used in creating jobs, not handouts like our Socialist European metric-users.”

“eliminating minimum wage laws will allow companies to hire many more Americans for just a fraction of the price. If Mexicans can work for 2$ an hour, so can we.”

Open Mic:

“STOP STEALING OUR WATER! I was watering my plant the other day and I noticed all the water disappeared! WHAT has the state of LIBERAL politics gotten to when your water is vanishing from everywhere!! Sometimes I go to the bathroom and there's no toilet paper either, they should FIX that!”

“At the present time I would suggest some Federal money would be well spent to employ everyone in Louisana that is not working to help clean up the coastline.”

“GOP BEWARE. Personal attacks against Tea Party backed candidates shows how desperate you are to gain power and move the country to the ultra-right. Which by the way is no better than what we have now in power, the ultra-left. There are millions of people that are tired of these kinds of campaign tactics and the majority of them believe in the tea party message. Be warned, if you choose to use personal attacks and not substance in your campaign, your party will see their numbers dwindle.”

I suspect GOP interns have been tasked with erasing the bogus/unwanted entries as fast as folks can input them.