Great Olympic Moments

I think if Tennessee ever hosted the winter Olympic games they might look something like this:

Let The Women Jump

Welcome, Eschatonians!

I’ve always wondered why there is no women’s ski jump event in the Winter Olympics. And literally, I have always wondered that, ever since I was a little kid, because it's obvious women have been doing every other winter sport in the games--luge, downhill skiing, ice hockey, etc. So women’s ski jumping has always been notable for its absence.

It makes no sense: we can fly through the air on snowboards, do back flips on the moguls, yet we can’t ski jump? What’s up with that? Especially since men’s ski jumping has been an Olympic event since the 1920s.

It seems the issue is a hot topic this year and via this MSNBC.com video I finally have my answer. Although some very thin and lame excuses have been floated around, what it seems to boil down to is that the European men don’t want to be shown up by a bunch of girls, one of whom holds the record on the actual ski jump used at the Vancouver games.

Yes that’s right, Lindsey Van beat the men’s record on the exact same ski jump the men will be sliding down to claim their Olympic medals this week. I ask you: how fucked up is that?

This quote cracked me up:

In 2005, Gian Franco Kasper, FIS president and a member of the IOC, said that he didn't think women should ski jump because the sport "seems not to be appropriate for ladies from a medical point of view."

Oh my God are we still having that same argument? Seriously? In this day and age? What does Gian Franco Kasper think is going to happen? Vaginas scattered all over the hill? Menstrual blood on the start bar? Boobies flying through the air?

If you think about it, it seems like men with all that stuff dangling around down there would be less "medically" suited to a whole bunch of sports, not just ski jumping. Imagine if one of y'all's testicles just flew off in mid-air. Someone could get hurt. An eye could get poked out.

Even worse is IOC member Dick Pound, who withdrew his head from his ass long enough to utter this asinine warning to the women ski jumpers:

"If in the meantime you're making all kinds of allegations about the IOC and how it's discriminating on the basis of gender," he warned, "the IOC may say, 'Oh yeah, I remember them. They're the ones that embarrassed us and caused us a lot of trouble of trouble in Vancouver, maybe they should wait another four years or eight years.'"

Oh, man. Is that a threat? Are you fucking serious?

You know what I’d like to see? I’d like to see all female athletes stick together on this one--and I mean all of them. Skaters, skiers, gymnasts, track stars, tennis players, golfers, you name it. Because if bogus “medical reasons” and lies about “competitiveness” are still being used to bar women athletes from the Olympic games, then they will be used to bar women from every avenue of achievement. The Olympic Games are not just about medals; for the athletes involved, it’s about sponsorships, it’s about access to gear and training facilities. It’s about validating your sport.

In the meantime, to learn more about the isssue or help the cause, go to Women’s Ski Jumping USA.

Rebel against the patriarchy--and the stupidity!

It’s Not About You

How desperate do you need to be for a victory that you celebrate Chicago’s failure to get the 2016 Olympic Games?

Truly, what I find most striking about the fist-pumping and high-fives and general elation from conservatives over Chicago’s ouster in the first round of voting is that it’s happening at all.

“Enjoy this -- savor this moment,” said Glenn Beck on his radio show.

Gloated Rush Limbaugh, “For those of you on the other side of the aisle listening in who are upset that I sound gleeful -- I am. I don't deny it. I'm happy.”

The news was met with cheers at The Weekly Standard newsroom.

So apparently after an entire summer of astroturfed Town Hollers and a march on Washington D.C. that drew a quadruple gazillion trillion protesters (or thereabouts), conservatives' best political victory is Chicago not getting the Olympics.

This just speaks volumes about the irrelevance of American conservatives. Think about it: after the millions of dollars spent to derail the economic stimulus, healthcare reform and cap-and-trade; after all of the bandwidth devoted to spreading crackpot “birther” theories, FEMA detention camp scams, and fearmongering about socialist indoctrination; after the stacks of Tea Party signs warning of Socialism and Fascism and "Oligarhy”; after literally months of this bullshit, their big victory is something they had absolutely nothing to do with.

What does that tell you?

Let me give my conservative friends a little reality check: American politics does not, in fact, occupy the rest of the world’s attention 24/7. Our Democrat v. Republican hissy fits do not, in fact, drive decisions made by international bodies like the IOC. Not every decision has to do with America, and not every decision that affects America has a poltical component. In short, it's not always about us, and it's not always about you.

Try as you might to make the decision a statement about the world rejecting Obama, that makes about as much sense as saying it’s the world rejecting AT&T, Bank of America, Archer Daniels Midland, Kraft Foods, Boeing, or any of the dozens of other U.S. corporations which donated megabucks to the Chicago 2016 effort. Not everything is political and not everything is partisan.

The fact that you’ve failed to grasp that is truly pathetic.

Why I Can’t Watch The Olympics

No, it has nothing to do with Darfur, or China’s human rights record, or their treatment of Buddhist monks in TIbet.

I simply can’t stay up that late. And I’m trying, trust me. I fell asleep, remote control in hand, trying to catch Nastia Liukin and Shawn Johnson Thursday night. Somewhere between the vault and uneven bars I succumbed. I think it was around 11 pm.

It really kind of ticks me off. It’s a freaking school night, for crying out loud! NBC: why did I have to watch an hour of swimming preliminaries? I could care less about preliminaries. Unless you’re an avid follower of the sport, or something really unusual happens, no one cares about preliminaries.

So, prime time is filled with coverage of preliminary heats that no one cares about, while big-viewership events like women’s gymnastics are on at midnight. What idiot at NBC thought that was a good idea?

And yes, apparently all of this is NBC’s fault. In a story about Michael Phelps in today’s New York Times, I learned this:

For the first time, the Olympic finals have been contested between 10 a.m. and noon instead of at night. NBC, which owns the broadcasting rights to the Games in the United States, wanted it that way so that Phelps’s pursuit of Spitz could be shown in prime time.

Oh, wow. So it really is all about American TV viewers? Great. I want to see Phelps win his medals, too. But I’m interested in some other events, as well. And frankly, I’m not so much of an enthusiast that I have to see it live.

I remember the whole broadcast-time thing being an issue when the summer games were held in South Korea and Australia, too. And it seems to me that the traditional way of broadcasting the games just doesn’t work anymore. There needs to be some kind of on-demand thing offered, where folks can subscribe to those events they care about watching. At least tell us what time these events come on so we can set the TiVo, for crying out loud.

NBC is holding on to its Olympics broadcast rights with both hands, but the result is that I’m watching less Olympics coverage than ever before. I really don’t care about volleyball or preliminary heats in swimming and track and field. I’m never told exactly when those events I do want to see will be broadcast. So we end up flipping around the channels, watching other stuff and only by the luck of the draw catching an event of interest. It’s frustrating and at this point I’m ready to give up.

I’ll just read about it in the paper the next day.